29 replies to this topic

[kschneider]

I am ashamed to post this and I really don't know why I am. I don't know if I need advice, insight, or just reassurance that I'm not a terrible person but the guilt I feel is unbearable. My two pit mixes attacked and killed my doberman yesterday. He bled out all over my kitchen floor and I had to have my neighbor put him out of his misery by shooting him in my backyard. I live in the country, far from any emergency vet and I knew my dog wouldn't make it. I didn't want him to suffer. Shortly there after we took my two remaining dogs to the vet to be put down. The dogs got in a fight over food, while I had run outside to shovel the gate open so my neighbor could plow the driveway. I feel so guilty that I wasn't there to stop it. I feel so guilty that i ran out the door in a hurry forgetting to put their dishes up. I feel so guilty that my dog, who was my baby, had to suffer and die that way. I miss all three of them terribly and I don't know how to cope with this and I can't get the images out of my head. I just hate myself right now. I didn't protect my dog. I never thought this would happen. The house is heartbreakingly quiet and I can't stand it.

[Arda]

The hardest thing I ever had to learn in my whole life was that DOGS are both wild and domestic in the same body.  Some of the things they do are wild instinct and some of the things they do are learned or domestic.  Any dog is capable of having the wild instincts come out under certain conditions.  All we can do is try to control their environment.  And some times that isn't enough.  I'm very sorry you had to go through this.

[doberpagegirl]

I'm so terribly sorry. I don't know what to say, except I pray for comfort for you. It's hard to accept that our "tame" dogs are capable of this, but like Arda said, they are still animals. I'm so, so terribly sorry.

[kschneider]

Thank you for your kind words. They truly make me feel better about the situation. Although I don't know if I'll ever be able to have more than one dog at a time, ever again. I know that things could always be worse and I'm thankful this happened now and not several years down the road when children may have been around. Hope everyone is having a good new year so far. Thanks again

[Lori]

I am so sorry this happened to you. My 2 girls Ghost and Nova, were so bonded they couldn't live without each other, yet twice got into a fight over food. I fed them in separate areas but Nova would sometimes try to take Ghost's food from her. You do what you can, and you are only human. None of us are perfect. I really feel for you. Don't let the guilt eat you up. And the silence part is awful. I'm going through it myself right now. Prayers for you...

[Arda]

Kimberly;  There is so much I want to say to you.  Just don't want to say the wrong things.  Or to make you feel any worse than you already feel.  But let me tell you this.............I have 20 Dobes in my home at any one time.  No matter how well they get along together or how bad they get along together, each one has his own crate and a spot where the crate belongs.  Everyone is fed in that crate with the door closed.  If I go to feed the horses, they are locked in their crate till I come back in.  If I go to the store, they are locked in their crate till I get back.  If someone comes over, they are locked in their crate.  The crate is not a punishment.  It's their safe place.  Their home.  Their DEN.  I honestly know we could not handle this many dogs if we didn't use the crate.  We still have an occasional fight and a few of those fights have been BAD.  And most of the time we could not tell you what the fight was about.  But we do eliminate the food fights by not feeding them together.  Dogs are dogs and they do these things because they are dogs.  But staying on top of those triggers we can see and we know that it makes it much easier to handle them.  Don't blame yourself for the accidents, just learn from them.  My 45 years of Dobermanns tell me to crate, train, and control.  They are not little kids in a fur coat.  They can not be trusted 100 % of the time.  Even Chaos will steal a cookie off the cookie plate.  And Omi will put a hole in Dennis if the opportunity arises.  And Mickey will steal my slippers if they are visible.  And Karma will not come in the house when you want her to.  Take every precaution possible.

[LibbyTea]

This made me think of after I had gotten Libby - she had been here over a year but she put a hole in Lillydales head with one snap. This is a dog who lets Teddy take a toy out of her mouth. All because Lilly was growling. It reminded me that no matter how many toys are out they can't be trusted to make the right choices. Little kids fight and kick and yell - dogs growl and snap.
I'm so sorry that that happened to you, you will come to terms with it. I pray you find the peace you need to go past this.

[kschneider]

Thank you. It's a learning experience from a very bad situation I guess.

Edited by kschneider, 06 January 2015 - 05:56 PM.

[Diana]

 Coming in late on this, but very sorry for your losses, like everyone else said, they are animals and we do the best we can to keep peace and we learn along the way, but what a horrible thing for you, so very sorry. Hugs to you.

[jmnodwell]

No matter how well we think we know them we will never know 100% of the time what they will do. That is a fact of dog, or any animal, ownership.  And it could happen to any one of us even those who are very experienced. From your account, you had many things going on at one time and that's all it takes sometimes, a split second of inattention. We are only human after all.  I am sooooo very sorry that your story ended in the way that it did but we can never keep them 100% safe.  You responded the best and as quickly as you could in that horrible time and!!!  Hugs and prayers to you in this terrible, terrible time!!!

 

Please learn from this and keep your heart open for another dog...

[LuvmydobeApollo]

OMG how horrific for you!!!  im so sorry to hear this,.,..what a horrible tragedy..my last 2 males didnt get along out of the blue,,we had to keep them seperate at all times... it was awful.... i feel so bad for  you..... prayers to  you and your family....

Sharen

[Arda]

Please everyone..........understand that it also goes on with the females.  Dogs that have never been separated from birth and all of a sudden those wild instincts that we don't completely understand grab them like the devil and we have a bloody mess.  We never have 100% complete control of these dogs.  Dennis runs with Hobby, Red, Boogie, and Bruce when he was still here.  Omi would ignore Biscuit and Chatterly but would not tolerate Dennis, Hobby, Boogie, or Red.  Chaos would run with all of them but not all of them would run with him.  Chaos is in a pack with Dennis and Nickie.  I take a lot of time to set up my packs and I still have more than my own set of problems.  Kissie and Karma were fine with a lot of females and then like a devil made them do it, they would turn on someone and it was a mess.  Kissie is gone now and Karma is no longer having these fights.  But the combination of Kissie and Karma was lethal.  Why?  I can't give you the clear version of it but it's like certain pairs make a complete dog.  And when that complete dog is out there, they are really bad together.  They feed off of each other.  Usually it only happens when the Alpha is not present.  They call me Alpha White.  But it has happened when I was out there and they got too bold for their britches.  Usually I mow or do yard chores with only certain dogs with me that I don't have to watch like a hawk.  And the rest are locked in their crates for safe keeping.  It's all a learning process and it never ends.  We have to learn everyday or we are kidding ourselves.  I will never know enough about them.

[ohiodobe]

Kim, I am so sorry for your devastating loss. No matter how you look at it you lost 3 dogs almost at the same time. I can't imagine how it feels especially without the comfort of dog next to you now. Healing thoughts and prayers to you.  Linda

[Karen A]

Kim, I cannot even begin to tell you how sorry I am for the trauma you experienced.....I cannot even imagine.  You must be in a state of shock.   Arda told me once, that once you have more than one dog, you have a pack and it's a huge job trying to be a pack leader and control the instincts of them.  I wish I could take that image from your mind and replace it with all the good memories of them.  You're only human.   Praying for peace for you.

[kschneider]

Thank you for all of your kind words and advice.

[Lori]

I was thinking of you and wondering how you were doing. Hugs and prayers for you.

[kschneider]

Doing a lot better than I was. I still can't look at pictures of the dogs without crying, so I'm avoiding them   Looking forward to the day when I can think of all the good memories we had, instead of just the bad one. We recently got a 7 month old puppy from friends who didn't want her anymore. They got her from the Saginaw shelter at 6 weeks and I guess loss interest when she started to get bigger. They asked if we wanted her and I said I would take her   I wasn't planning on getting another dog so soon but the house was too quiet so we thought it would help to move on by having a cute puppy hanging around   She looks like a small yellow lab, although I know her mother was a pit bull mix of some kind. I couldn't stand to have a dog that looked remotely like any of our three dogs. Dobermans will always remain my favorite breed but I still feel so guilty about what happened to Harley, that I could not bear to have another one right now. Some day Thank you for asking.

[kschneider]

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[Pam]

So glad to see this-you've been in my thoughts. I hope your heart can now begin to heal. She's a real cutie. 

[Annie Moon]

Kim... what a nightmare you've been through... I'm so sorry for your losses.

Your new girl is beautiful... She will help to heal your heart.