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My beautiful, sweet, angel....Neo


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#1 Nofal & Lisa Paulus

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Posted 03 March 2011 - 03:39 PM

Almost four years ago, I lost my last rescue Dobe, Blade, to a debilitating spinal disease. Blade was a sweet, sweet soul with not a single bad bone in his body. I never thought his sweetness and purity could be eclipsed until my wife and I visited Second Chance and found our Neo, who was originally named Newago because he was found in Newago county.

Neo has been my life and my love ever since coming into our home. From the very beginning, he would tiptoe into our closet and come out with the very last article of clothing or footwear I had on and take it to his bed and sleep with it in between his paws. It was beyond heartmelting to see him do this day after day, night after night. Whether he knew from my scent what I had worn last I really don't know. Last spring I had devastating news that he had developed a malignant tumor under his right eye. It was the size of a small golf ball, if you can picture it. We had that removed and life went on. A few months later, we detected a tumor at the very base of his tongue and it was impeding his breathing and his eating. This was more devastating than the first cancer episode because of the very delicate spot it was in. We consulted with MSU's Vetieranary Dept. and they talked about the possibility of removing his tongue...? My God, what an awful thought. Then we finally opted to place him in the care of the Oncology Dept at Michigan Vet Specialists in Southfield. Neo had wonderful, wonderful people caring for him. Every weekday morning for four straight weeks Neo and I left the house to go for his radiation appointments. Then an hour or so later, I would pick him up and take him home hoping he would eat for me. As the radiation therapy progressed, his pain increased. They described it as having a really, really painful burn on the top of your mouth except in his case, it was his entire mouth that was burning. My heart broke for him but he pulled through it and was back to normal in no time after. Spending each morning together for those four weeks brought Neo and I closer together than ever and I never thought I could adore him any more than I already did. We became extraordinarily close throughout the whole experience and his bond with me seemed so much deeper, as if he knew what we had been through together.

Now, Neo has another battle he's facing and my heart is shattered because I fear this one may be too much for him. I pulled out the dogs' leashes on Monday night and he was so excited that he started gasping for air then started losing his legs. After calming him down, I got on line and started searching for canine cardiac arrest symptoms. He had two out of the first three so we rushed him back to the emergency room at MVS. During that first night, Neo's heart rate rose to an inconceivable 350 bpm twice! They couldn't believe he was still alive after each episode. But he was, and since then he has been on a Lidocaine IV drip. I have gone every morning, lunchtime, afternoon and evening to lay with him in his pen and try to comfort him as much as possible. His cardiologist said she couldn't send him home until he was off the IV and on an oral medication.

Just when I was hoping that he would be released today to go back home to be with Lola, Maxx, Lisa and myself...another potential blow. Walking him outside they noticed his head was bobbing. His Doc said it could very likely be from the many days on Lidocaine and it would subside within 6-8 hours or it could be that the cancer he had on his tongue had spread to his brain. I have always been very optimistic but for the first time during this whole ordeal, I looked into Neo's eyes and I saw something different. I saw unhappiness to a degree that I've never seen in him and my heart sank into my stomach. I called my wife and told her that I had a gut feeling the end was near....my dear God in heaven, I so hope that I am wrong...very, very wrong.

We all know well how sweet, innocent, precious and special these wonderful creations of God are. All our Dobies are magical and all their hearts are pure. I don't know, I guess I thought by writing out my feelings it would help with the pain but it seems the sadness I feel only becomes more profound. I know I will go on, I know I will save as many Dobies as I can for the rest of my life and that there will be others whose names I'm yet to know...but this boy, my boy, my sweet sweet angel is the most precious animal I have ever come across in my life. He is absolutely adored by the entire staff at MVS and they are all constantly rotating in and out of his pen to give him hugs, kisses and words of encouragement.

I have rescued five Dobes so far but when the time comes that I have to let them go and the finality of it all and the incredible sadness in losing them hits...it never seems to get any easier and is even infinitely compounded when the love I feel is so strong. My boy is dying and it is absolutely killing me...

Neo, if I have you for a day, a month or another year, I will always be eternally grateful to God that he picked ME to be blessed with YOU. You are my angel on earth and I love you deeply and completely. My only wish is for you to never, ever feel any pain because I was chosen to guard and protect you against all that may harm you. I would gladly accept a lifetime of pain for me to have experienced the joy of being with you just for one moment.

I will carry you in my heart forever and one day...we will be together again. Me, you, Blazer, Clyde and Blade. If you need to leave me...I understand and I will love you no less...I am your papa forever.

#2 Karen A

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Posted 03 March 2011 - 04:22 PM

Nofal and Lisa, I am so sorry. I feel for you wholeheartedly. Your note made me cry because I know how hard it is and I know how much you care for your dobes. He'll let you know when he's ready. He trusts you. We are blessed to be able to set our suffering animal companions free from their failing bodies to be whole again. It's final thank you for all they do for us :rolleyes:
We give dogs the time we can spare, the space we can spare, and the love we can spare. And, in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.
-M. Acklam

#3 Nancy Robinson

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Posted 03 March 2011 - 04:55 PM

:rolleyes: I am so so very sorry, I know what you are going through. Treasure
every moment as I know you are. He loves you more than life itself
and he knows how much you love him. Special PRAYERS AND THOUGHTS
are sent to you. I am sincerely sorry, he will let you know when the
time is right. Bless you all. :)


Footprints in the Sand One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky. In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand. Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there were one set of footprints. This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints. So I said to the Lord, "You promised me Lord, that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there have only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when I needed you most, you have not been there for me?" The Lord replied, "The times when you have seen only one set of footprints, is when I carried you." :LOL:








Nancy

"Until one has LOVED AN ANIMAL, part of
their SOUL REMAINS UNAWAKENED"

"
Yesterday is "HISTORY", Today is a "GIFT" and Tomorrow is a "MYSTERY"

"Always always try to be the" BEST YOU CAN BE"

Do not walk in front of me - I may not follow.
Do not walk behind me - I may not lead.
But walk beside me - and be my friend.

May you always have Love to Share
Health to Spare
and Friends who Care

Forever locked in my Heart

"I CARRY YOUR HEARTS IN MY HEART"........FOREVER

My "WHITE ANGEL".....Sweet sweet Schaudeh
4/17/1999...............5/14/2013
My "Bounty Hunter"
11/6/2000.......8/3/2009
My "Miks Von Rom Mateese"
7/6/1990..........4/4/1999

"I LOVED you yesterday, I LOVE you today, and I will LOVE you tomorrow'"
for you have never really left me

#4 Arda

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Posted 03 March 2011 - 05:40 PM

My heart is breaking not only for Neo but for you. We are all with you, holding your hand and praying.
A chain is only as strong as it's weakest link.

#5 LuvmydobeApollo

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Posted 03 March 2011 - 06:37 PM

oh my.... im sorry you are going through this. its just horrible. You have given him more than he probably ever expected in his life as a rescue dog. We get so close to them.. and its hard to know what to do and when to do it. Letting him go peacefully when you feel its time, is that last great, loving gift we can give them. Prayers for you and your family.
Sharen

#6 Cheri

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Posted 03 March 2011 - 06:42 PM

Nofal, I have just finished reading your post and tears are flowing. What you have written is without a doubt the most beautiful and loving tribute to a dog I have ever read. My heart is breaking for you. I am so sorry for this difficult, painful time you, your wife and Neo are going through. I know there is nothing I can say to make this any easier for you, but just know that you are among friends here, friends who understand how deep the love for a dog can go.........

Currently part of my treasured family and helping to make life fun and busy:

 

Hunter, the chocolate Labradeagle (or Beaglador)

Terra, the tall, gorgeous red Doberwoman

 

Waiting at the Bridge and forever in my heart...... Igor, Max, Savanna, Logan, and Tasha


#7 doberpagegirl

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Posted 03 March 2011 - 08:10 PM

Thank you for loving him so much. Thank you for doing everything possible for him. I am so so sorry that you are facing this. You are his partner, his life. He trusts you and whatever happens you will do what is best for him. No one knows Neo like you do, and he will let you know. Sending hugs and prayers to you all. :rolleyes:

It matters to the one you save.

SCD's Out on Bail CGC (December 17, 2008- April 27, 2018)
SCD's Stone Soup
SCD's Sixpence in my shoe
SCD's Hurricane Alley CGC (August 12, 2007- September 11, 2014)
SCD's Easter Buddy CGC (August 12, 2007- July 5, 2012)
Page, Princess Extraordinaire - (July 9, 2000- July 31, 2007)


#8 Diana

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Posted 03 March 2011 - 08:12 PM

I am so sorry to read this news of Neo, you have been down some bumpy roads together and have a strong love for each other and you have given so much love to Neo, this just breaks my heart to read your story of your journey together. Hugs and prayer's being sent your way. :rolleyes:
Diana and Nixx
SCD's Wild Child Gamble CGC

#9 jmnodwell

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Posted 03 March 2011 - 09:15 PM

Prayers and hugs for you all!!!

Joni
Emmalin Jane, George, Clyde, and Rascal (meow & hiss)
From the Bridge - Cosmo (12/2005), Katie (7/2006), Mr. Munchkin (11/2008), Bella DSA, CGC (1/2009), Skitter DSA (12/2010), Beau (11/2014), and Calvin (6/2017)

 

"The world of the generous gets larger and larger... The on who blesses other is abundantly blessed; those who help other are helped." Proverbs 11:24-25

"They that sow in tears shall reap in joy" Psalms 126:5


#10 dobie sunshine

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 06:13 AM

Your story brings tears to my eyes, it is so beautifully written. Sending hugs and prayers to Neo, you and your family. :rolleyes:

#11 ella

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 08:16 AM

Your in my thoughts and prayers. God bless you and yours.
Ella - mother of Princess and Bonnie Blue



A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
-Josh Billings

#12 Arda

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 09:05 AM

In my life time of rescue, we rarely find homes like Nofal provides for these furkids of ours. This is breaking my heart. Totally breaking my heart. I can't get it out of my thoughts. I am praying for all of you.
A chain is only as strong as it's weakest link.

#13 Nofal & Lisa Paulus

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 11:46 AM

I would like to say that I read your replies and took it like a champ keeping myself together....but the sentiments that each and everyone of you sent to us were so touching, so beautiful, so heartfelt that I just completely lost it. I had to shut my office door and I'm pretty sure I look like my eyes look like I've been used as a punching bag.

Arda, thank you so much for your very, very kind words, I'm honestly so humbled by them. But I look at you, what you do, what you sacrifice, how endless your well of love is for these wonderful animals and I am in awe of you. I hope you realize how much of a hero you are to me and countless others. Loving a dog, truly loving a dog is about sacrifice more than anything. That we are so thankful of their unending love for us that we simply must do everything we can to make their lives as joyful as possible...and protect them from harm as best we can. That's the hardest part of all because I so much want take all his pain and put it in me...

From the bottom of my heart, thank you, thank you, thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. It truly means so much to me and I will read all your posts to Neo when I go to visit him again at lunchtime.

The most important lesson my sweet, beautiful, angel Neo has taught me is that I am so imperfect as a person as he is perfect as a dog. He is my idol, who I want to emulate but I know I can never be as pure and good as he is. He's just too good of a soul so I'll just have to keep reaching for the sky and hope that I get closer...

God bless you all and God bless all the Dobermans and every other animal in this world who suffers needlessly from pain, neglect or loneliness. I wish we could help them all.

Edited by Nofal & Lisa Paulus, 04 March 2011 - 11:52 AM.


#14 yahoosmom

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 01:46 PM

I just read your post about your angel Neo. My prayers and thoughts are with Neo and your family. It is very heart breaking for us all to see
our best friend in pain. You have done more for Neo then you know, he knows you are at his side and caring with all your heart. The story about your
piece of clothing just tore my heart apart. Your Neo had you at his side no matter what. Thank you for giving Neo such a wonderful life of joy and happiness.

#15 Annie Moon

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 01:58 PM

Nofal, I have just finished reading your post and tears are flowing. What you have written is without a doubt the most beautiful and loving tribute to a dog I have ever read. My heart is breaking for you. I am so sorry for this difficult, painful time you, your wife and Neo are going through. I know there is nothing I can say to make this any easier for you, but just know that you are among friends here, friends who understand how deep the love for a dog can go.........


Cheri said what I would like to say if my eyes weren't so blurred by tears.
Blessings to your family and to dear Neo.
In Memory of Mariah He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.  ~Unknown~


#16 Karen A

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 09:58 PM

I found a pic of Nofal and Lisa on the day they adopted Neo.....what a wonderful, blessed day that was for Neo :rolleyes:

Attached File  Nofal_and_Neo.jpg   100.54KB   6 downloads
We give dogs the time we can spare, the space we can spare, and the love we can spare. And, in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.
-M. Acklam

#17 Nancy Robinson

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 10:14 PM

I found a pic of Nofal and Lisa on the day they adopted Neo.....what a wonderful, blessed day that was for Neo :rolleyes:

Attached File  Nofal_and_Neo.jpg   100.54KB   6 downloads


Oh Geez, thank you for sharing..............
Nancy

"Until one has LOVED AN ANIMAL, part of
their SOUL REMAINS UNAWAKENED"

"
Yesterday is "HISTORY", Today is a "GIFT" and Tomorrow is a "MYSTERY"

"Always always try to be the" BEST YOU CAN BE"

Do not walk in front of me - I may not follow.
Do not walk behind me - I may not lead.
But walk beside me - and be my friend.

May you always have Love to Share
Health to Spare
and Friends who Care

Forever locked in my Heart

"I CARRY YOUR HEARTS IN MY HEART"........FOREVER

My "WHITE ANGEL".....Sweet sweet Schaudeh
4/17/1999...............5/14/2013
My "Bounty Hunter"
11/6/2000.......8/3/2009
My "Miks Von Rom Mateese"
7/6/1990..........4/4/1999

"I LOVED you yesterday, I LOVE you today, and I will LOVE you tomorrow'"
for you have never really left me

#18 Nancy Robinson

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 10:17 PM

:rolleyes:
I asked God to bless you
As I prayed for you today
To guide you and protect you
As you go along your way....
His love is always with you
:) His promises are true,
And when we give Him all our cares
You know He will see us through
So when the road you're traveling on
Seems difficult at best
Just remember I'm here praying
And God will do the rest.

:LOL:

Edited by Nancy Robinson, 04 March 2011 - 10:18 PM.

Nancy

"Until one has LOVED AN ANIMAL, part of
their SOUL REMAINS UNAWAKENED"

"
Yesterday is "HISTORY", Today is a "GIFT" and Tomorrow is a "MYSTERY"

"Always always try to be the" BEST YOU CAN BE"

Do not walk in front of me - I may not follow.
Do not walk behind me - I may not lead.
But walk beside me - and be my friend.

May you always have Love to Share
Health to Spare
and Friends who Care

Forever locked in my Heart

"I CARRY YOUR HEARTS IN MY HEART"........FOREVER

My "WHITE ANGEL".....Sweet sweet Schaudeh
4/17/1999...............5/14/2013
My "Bounty Hunter"
11/6/2000.......8/3/2009
My "Miks Von Rom Mateese"
7/6/1990..........4/4/1999

"I LOVED you yesterday, I LOVE you today, and I will LOVE you tomorrow'"
for you have never really left me

#19 yahoosmom

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Posted 04 March 2011 - 10:48 PM

Thanks for posting the picture of them. I looked for it and couldn't find it.

#20 LStevens

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Posted 05 March 2011 - 06:20 PM

Nofal and Lisa -

I read with great sadness about Neo's ordeal, and your great love for him. Your account of Neo picking out your clothes and sleeping with them literally made me cry. We all love our animals, but occasionally one comes along that we bond with more so than others that have come into our lives. I know your heart is breaking. Neo had the best "Dad" and "Mom" . . . and the best care imaginable. Doesn't make it any easier, I know. Thank you for giving him a wonderful, loving home. He could not have been more loved. I will keep all of you in my prayers.


Linda

The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated ... I hold that, the more helpless a creature, the more entitled it is to protection by man from the cruelty of man.
-------------------------
Never To Be Forgotten

SCD's Sugar Bear 06/18/2017
Shadow a/k/a Little Snoopy
SCD's Betty Boo
SCD's Grindle
Bart (1993-1998)
Gunnar (1986-1992)
Sigmund (1975-1985)
Greta Von Reiman (1972-1984)





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